So Hungry

I don’t know why today’s different than the last few weeks – I haven’t been super hungry lately and yet today I am STARVING. I am counting the minutes until lunch and I’m pretty disappointed that my main meal is leftover mac and cheese. I have additional food with me (cheese, yogos, an apple, dried apricots and some pudding) but I have a feeling that may not be enough. I already ate some candy and some cashews and crackers and they did nothing but make me hungrier. Of course the sad thing will probably be once I actually start eating, I’ll be full before I’m finished because my stomach gets so full so fast. But them I’ll have leftover food when I get hungry about 45 minutes later.

I am taking my physical therapist’s advice and placing a rolled scarf under my belly for some support for while I’m sitting at my desk. My belly feels so big and unsupported. I haven’t had to wear the belt for my joint pain but I am back to wearing the other belt that helps support under the belly and the lower back. Maybe I can add suspenders to the super snazzy Velcro belt too and make my own fashion statement. A little bedazzling will work wonders.

I need to reassess my clothing options and put aside some of the tops or pants that have become too uncomfortable. I feel downright frumpy and constricted today. I tried to spice up my color palette since I seem to only wear gray and black and I’m wearing a brown and peach top but it’s a little tight in the belly and as much as I love a fitted top to show off my Buddha belly, I feel fat and unattractive. I need to combat these feelings of not knowing how to handle my bigger body. I look in the mirror and sometimes I am so excited to see that belly and other times I look and just see some fat chick that I don’t recognize. I look at pictures of me in the last year and somehow it doesn’t look like how I see myself in my head. I guess it’s like when you hear your voice on a tape recorder and think “Oh noes…do I really sound like that?”

I’ve started to get overheated and this is a strange experience for a girl who normally has to wear multiple layers of clothes in the winter. I would normally always wear tights under my pants plus socks and a long sleeved shirt under a sweater as my normal winter garb. But I’m wearing a short sleeved shirt with a very light sweater and I’m still warm (but don’t want to take the sweater off and show more of my frump top). So this is a definite advantage of being pregnant. My hands are usually so cold, they would be numb. But instead I have warm puffy hands.

33 weeks tomorrow. I haven’t posted a “how big is the baby” comparison in awhile. (I’ve been very bad lately about posting any photos or images) so, here’s the latest…I am carrying a honeydew.